I woke up Saturday with the worse cold I've had in a long time. I probably shouldn't have gone out, but I had a full day of networking scheduled that I was too stubborn to cancel. By the time I got home for my Skype date with the boy, I was absolutely miserable. But, like everything, I made the best of it by letting him take silly sick screen shots of me. I was so thankful for his virtual company and all the laughs that got me through the sickness on Saturday.
Luckily, I woke up feeling much better on Sunday. Good thing too because I had a very important luncheon to attend at the house of an executive from General Motors. The lunch went really well and I just happy to be surrounded by such inspiring and accomplished people. After the dinner, I was dropped off in XinTianDi and then started walking home. Out of freaking nowhere (and maybe the 3 glasses of wine had something to do with it), I started having an anxiety/panic attack. It was horrible and it had been months since I'd had one.
I can't really explain how it happened, or why it happened, but I think it was a combination of stress, frustration, rejection, and just knowing that I have quite the uphill battle to fight in order to get a job out here. I have the pressure that my visa is running out, and on top of that, the pressure that I still can't pinpoint the exact kind of job I want to find. I wish I had a solid answer to give when people ask me what I want to be when I grow up.
Fortunately, the anxiety quickly faded away and I found myself back at home, resting, relaxing, and watching episodes of ANTM. And then, I ended my Sunday just how I end most days: On skype with the boy, laughing, talking, dancing, and taking silly screenshots of our conversations. Today, I woke up feeling thankful that I have someone who listens to me at the end of every day and keeps my spirits up no matter how sick, or frustrated, or defeated I feel.
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